Youtubers Dan and Phil Confirm Relationship 16 Years Later

Iconic YouTuber duo, Dan and Phil, posing for a photo. Photo via Wikimedia Commons Author: Kingnunandrhysandfan

After 16 years, British YouTube duo Dan and Phil have finally confirmed their relationship in a video uploaded on Oct. 13, following years of rumors and speculation from fans. The iconic pair have been uploading snippets of their lives together to YouTube, nearly since 2009. 

They have amassed an impressive following, have gone on tour multiple times and have interacted with their fans in the flesh. Nowadays, they have been consistently uploading on their joint channel “Dan and Phil,” and with this recent news, they have started a weekly podcast on YouTube named “Hard Launch.” 

In their recent upload, the couple opens the video by addressing the question of “Are Dan and Phil in a relationship?” To which they answered, “Yes.” While this is absolutely the answer everyone has been looking for, the video is truly worth watching. 

Dan and Phil go on to discuss factors of why they kept their relationship under wraps, like the fact that they were in a gay relationship at a time when the world was less accepting. They also mention how young they were when they began posting and Dan’s inability to accept himself, a large hurdle he had to overcome with Phil’s support.

But most notably, they dig into the effects the internet had on their mental health, citing the pressures from fans and the internet as a whole as one of the sole reasons.

The pair were subject to one of the first instances of intense internet “shipping,” which is described by Wikipedia as “the desire by followers of a fandom for two or more people, either real-life people or fictional characters, to be in a romantic relationship”. 

Their fandom was devoted to whether or not Dan and Phil were dating. Fans would analyze nearly every video, every word, every touch and every moment of eye contact, searching for proof that would quell their curiosity. While Dan tried to dispel the rumors and give him and Phil the privacy they deserved, it ended up backfiring. 

“And for the most toxic people, it just made them hate me because me trying to deny it was getting in the way of their fun,” Dan said. 

The concept of a parasocial relationship has existed for many years, first being coined under the term “parasocial interaction” by American sociologists Donald Horton and R. Richard Wohl in 1956. 

With the increase in media consumption, people have been feeling more and more connected to internet personalities. This phenomenon has become much more popular, especially within subsets of different fans. The important thing to remember, that some do not, is that the people you watch do not know you. 

“That’s one of the hallmarks of a parasocial relationship: It’s a unidirectional one,” said Vance Ricks, an associate teaching professor of philosophy and computer science at Northeastern University. “In essence, the way that it makes sense to call it a relationship is you’re conjuring up the idea that there is a relationship, when in fact there really isn’t.”

Rick also said that it is essentially the job of an influencer “to encourage us to think of them as our buddies, our pals.” 

While this is true, it is also the responsibility of the consumer to understand that the perceived relationship is one-sided. In Dan and Phil’s case, they were young boys sharing their lives on the internet during a time when the future of parasocial relationships was completely unknown. 

Some of their fans who harassed, stalked and shipped them were even older than they were; it evolved into adults directly messaging the family members of these two young men. 

“How sad that we were just authentically being ourselves,” Dan said. “We never planned to be superstars, to have all of these people scrutinizing us. We were just using social media innocently, filming whatever videos we wanted.”

While it is important to limit your screentime, this is not to say you should not be a fan of any influencers, actors or internet personalities you like. The main intention is to remain aware of the screen dividing you and your favorite YouTuber: they are not your friend, and it is your responsibility to treat them with respect, which includes giving them the privacy they deserve.